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China Celebrates Status As Number One Air Polluter
This story has mostly positive ratings. 137 votes / 2 sinks

China Celebrates Status As Number One Air Polluter

Popular Videos – THE ONION NEWS NETWORK: China revels in a UN report that found it has the highest smog levels in the world, a sure sign of China's progress and prosperity.

Tags: SATIRE, Dalai Lama, Plots, Terrorist, Air Cleansing

View Story Discuss (28) (theonion.com) 115 days ago by ind06

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Rating: +11 (+11/-0) | 2008-03-26 02:56:48
ind06
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China commemorated the good news by granting every citizen a $300 people's tax rebate, in coal.

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Rating: +10 (+10/-0) | 2008-03-26 09:31:14
Uncle Dave
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Was that a LUMP sum payment?

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Rating: +4 (+4/-0) | 2008-03-26 17:15:11
Rinty
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A lumpa lumpa burnin love

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Rating: +4 (+4/-0) | 2008-03-26 18:03:25
ind06
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Sheesh Uncle Dave, every time I try to talk about something, you have to come along and make a FARCE out of it!

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Rating: +4 (+4/-0) | 2008-03-26 23:55:59
Uncle Dave
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I can't help it Luke, the Farce is with me....I thought it was gas!

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Rating: +3 (+3/-0) | 2008-03-27 04:31:38
ind06
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LOL! :D :)

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Rating: +9 (+9/-0) | 2008-03-26 05:18:53
bizexpert
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Good post, Thanks ind06!

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Rating: +8 (+8/-0) | 2008-03-26 05:37:29
ind06
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you're welcome, bizexpert. :)

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Rating: +10 (+10/-0) | 2008-03-26 09:39:30
rdy2rck
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Isn't that why there having the Olympics there. Cough.

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Rating: +7 (+7/-0) | 2008-03-26 14:25:52
Shadowolf
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...I can hack it...

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Rating: +5 (+5/-0) | 2008-03-26 17:17:08
Rinty
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Not over there Shadow. You're better off in a rickshaw.

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Rating: +4 (+4/-0) | 2008-03-26 23:57:49
Uncle Dave
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Don't they have a rear exhaust?

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Rating: +3 (+3/-0) | 2008-03-27 04:05:52
Rinty
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Yes they do Uncle Dave. Although their emissions are highly flammable, it's organic in it's molecular aeronautical genetic structure...it feels good helping the planet.

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Rating: +1 (+1/-0) | 2008-03-27 15:48:01
Uncle Dave
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So, what you're saying is that there is methane to their madness.

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Rating: +4 (+4/-0) | 2008-03-26 12:25:14
Rayman
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Communist China is the #1 violator of human rights. China's crackdown in Tibet is a clear sign of intimidation,oppression and communist military violence. This is said, the 2008 Beijing olympics MUST BE boycotted by all civilized nations who care about freedom, free press and respect of basic civil liberties. Furthermore, let's stop buying anything 'made in China'. China's pollution is just the tip of the icebirg. Even the food is contamined in China due to lack of laws and regulations. China is a 2 billion people jungle struggling to live in horrible conditions, except those who belong to the communist regime!

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Rating: +5 (+5/-0) | 2008-03-27 01:29:15
BronxBomber
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But they clean my laundry so well though. No ticky...No washy!

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Rating: +6 (+6/-0) | 2008-03-26 13:13:26
marshx
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congrats to china, finally that coveted #1 spot is theirs!

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Rating: +2 (+2/-0) | 2008-03-26 17:11:17
chevydog
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Actually, we thought that way even up to the 1950's. Smoke=industry=good jobs.

But getting rid of it has been sort of a mixed blessing.

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Rating: +6 (+6/-0) | 2008-03-26 13:28:45
itsme2
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They are so happy because thier people are used to it. This gives them an edge on thier Olympics!

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Rating: +3 (+3/-0) | 2008-03-26 22:57:54
Aotearoa
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It is a great day for china. Forward with progress!!!!!!!! cheers!!!!!!!we'll deal with the desease and other health problems from inhaling poisonous gas in the air and drinking and eating the toxic waste in the water and land when time comes .

leve leva e malanga kae tau

And just think what athletes are going to be inhaling while they compete in the olympics.

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Rating: +5 (+5/-0) | 2008-03-27 01:28:27
BronxBomber
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They say you can actually see the air in China though. So that's a plus..

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Rating: +1 (+1/-0) | 2008-03-27 15:35:04
Uncle Dave
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I like to see what I'm breathing.

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Rating: +1 (+3/-2) | 2008-03-27 01:57:38
BoxMonkey
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That is too funny .

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Rating: -2 (+0/-2) | 2008-03-27 02:48:47
vegbaresi
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So funny you guys believe in such a faked video, check this link to see who is the ambassador in the United States.

http://news.xinhuanet.com/zhengfu/2005-03/25/co...

Although it's a Chinese page, you can check photos in it.

Currently Zhou Wenzhong is the ambassador in the United States.

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Rating: +6 (+6/-0) | 2008-03-27 03:39:28
BronxBomber
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Quit spamming in here you stupid moronic dolt!

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Rating: +4 (+4/-0) | 2008-03-27 04:37:39
ind06
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Well vegbaresi, I can only say THANK GOD you came along with a link to the actual Chinese ambassador! How could I get through the day without you? PLEASE come back and allow me to bask in the glow of your accumulated wisdom again!

[Bronx Cheer]

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Rating: +1 (+1/-0) | 2008-03-27 15:44:00
Uncle Dave
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Hooray Bronx!

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